iExcel Series: Desire To Be Liked

Kit Gupta
Writer and Speaker Kit Gupta

IEXCEL SERIES  & KIT GUPTA

Don’t we all want to be liked by everyone around us. This is a condition that many of us have. To break this conditioning means we have to put in some effort. If you Empower The Observer within, as Author Speaker Kit Gupta talks about in his latest book, you could break such a conditioning that keeps you from performing at your highest level. In this inspirational video Kit shares details about this challenge.

iExcel Series: A global online series where people from around the world submit their video, audio, or written question or comments about personal improvement. If you’re interested in submitting a question or comment about personal improvement in your profession or relationship click here.

Learn more about author speaker Kit Gupta : https://www.kitgupta.com/ Read Authors Latest Blog: http://blog.kitgupta.com/

Watch Author’s latest world tour videos here.

 

 

Opportunity or Destiny: What do you call it?

Destiny Banner

The news about my boss, Andy, giving his two-week notice spread like wild fire in the department. Everyone who reported to him was apprehensive about what the next guy was going to be like.

Is the new guy going to be better or worse than Andy? Everybody was concerned about how this change would affect them, including other managers that worked with Andy.

Weeks later after Andy was gone, as I was working on the production floor, one of the technicians came up to me and said, “So I heard you have a new boss now.”

“Do I?” I inspected some plastic parts coming off a molding machine.

“You didn’t get the news yet? You and I will both be working for Shawn now,” he said as he scrunched up his face in discontent.

“Is is that bad?” I inquired.

“I don’t know how much you’ve worked with him, but he doesn’t deserve to be a manager,” he added, “The stars were lined up just right for him and the timing of it was right; that’s the only reason why he got to become a manager.”

Author Speaker Kit Gupta
Kit Gupta

Years later, I asked my audience at a speaking event: if they believed that everything, every single thing that they have in their life was because of their action. Some of them agreed, others did not.

Look at the above scenario. Andy made a clear conscious decision to quit and move somewhere else. So Andy created what he wanted through his action. However, Andy’s action also resulted in creating a vacant spot in the department. It’ll be foolish to say that Shawn intended that.

Did Shawn get the position because of his own action?

Some might argue that just like Andy, Shawn made a conscious decision of taking the position, so he created what he wanted through his action. Yes. But one intricate component of this scenario is that the decision made by one person (Andy) impacted what the other person (Shawn) got. That  is referred to as destiny by some and opportunity by others.

Every one of us experiences this phenomenon in our personal relationships or professional careers at some point of time in our life. That relationship that you so deeply desired with someone, but it never worked out. The job or career that you so yearned for, but you ultimately ended up doing something that you had never dreamed of. Perhaps there is a component that we don’t have a control over: people and events both, which changes what we end up with.

No matter what you call it: destiny or opportunity, taking action is what ultimately makes destiny or opportunity a reality. Whether the result in what you expected or not—take action.

Creating Fulfillment With Nothing

Kit Gupta, Founder iExcel Events by IE Sigma®
Kit Gupta, Founder iExcel Events by IE Sigma®

It’s an age old question: How can you get happiness from nothing? We buy a new car, a car we wanted since the first time we saw someone else driving it on the road, we feel happy. If we find a new job, a job that benefits us financially, we feel happy. It is not just the tangibles that give us this sense of fulfillment but also when we receive intangibles. If we receive compliments about the car we drive or when our boss or co-workers commend us for our accomplishments, our confidence is boosted- we feel worthy! If our partner appreciates us for the things we do with them or for them, we don’t hesitate to mention the joy and contentment we feel to our friends when having a relationship talk. Whether it is a tangible asset like a car, a job, a house, a life-partner, or an intangible like compliments, appreciation or love- we believe that happiness is achieved by giving and receiving.

Not only we have been told that if we give happiness to others we will be happy, but many of us have seen our parents, families and friends becoming happy or making others happy by making a trade of a tangible or an intangible asset. Independent of our race, religion, or nationality, we observe this phenomenon occurring at every level. Nations trade commodities for economic growth and peace, so we use this as a local phenomenon in our personal, professional and social lives.

But, what if our fulfillment and happiness was independent of what we receive or give others. What if we can wake up everyday full of contentment regardless of what we experienced at work. Independent of the amount financial losses in stock, independent of the loss of the promotion we were hoping for, for years. What if our fulfillment was not hinged upon any tangible or intangible. What would it take to create such a life at an individual level? What would we need to change about ourselves to create such a transformation?

Working on building a strategy to create a life of excellence that is independent of what we give or receive, starts with creating a deeper understanding of ourselves. Fulfillment in our personal, professional and social domains is achieved when we rewire the brain, think beyond profits and live here now. As we start building unique strategies that fit in the model of our life, strategies that are unique to us, that’s when we knowe we are on a path to creating happiness from no-thing.

Learn more about the work of Engineer-turned-Entrepreneur Kit Gupta and IE Sigma® -a non profit that takes you beyond science, technology, religion, and spirituality and works with individuals around the world to transform their personal, professional and social domains. Attend iexcelevents in a city near you to build strategies for excellence to create transformation in your life.